How NOT to talk to girls online

When it comes to online dating, first impresions are pretty much everything.

Sure, the initial hurdle may be swiping right and matching with a girl you’re actually into. But after that, your first words count and if you f*ck up your opener, you’re pretty much guaranteed to land in her online dating ‘slush’ pile.

Here are a few conversation starters to avoid...

“Slide into my DMs…”

Whether or not you are being intentionally creepy with this – or just trying to be funny – in no way will a girl respond to a request to slide into your DMs. This is a gesture of over-familiarity for which you will not be rewarded. Unless you and your lovely lass met on Instagram (where DM references may be acceptable.... sometimes) – ditch the DM chat and just keep it simple.

“Can I have your number?”

Again, there’s nothing worse than making the assumption that a girl is ready to hand over her number to you… a virtual stranger. Sure, at some point – if your conversation goes well and things progress – moving your chat over to text may be a natural next step. But, until she has had enough time to determine whether a) she is interested and b) you’re not a psychopath, it’s best to keep your chat confined to the safety of your online dating app of choice.


Um, snore… While you might think a simple “hi!” will suffice, if you’re not asking her a question, or at least expressing some half-hearted interest in something you’ve spotted on her profile, what the hell is she supposed to say in response? Don’t make her do all the work – keep it interesting!

“Are you free tonight/tomorrow/this week?”

Look, we don’t want to dash your hopes so early in the game, but don’t assume that just because you’ve matched, you’re destined to meet in person. A #swiperight with a girl does not automatically equate to a date and asking her out without putting in any groundwork first is not only presumptuous – it’s could also be a recipe for a disastrous date!

What are your failproof conversation starters? Let us know!